All About the Music.

This is the playlist I made back at the start of the year and as we only have three months left I figured I'd finally release this. 

That's it for today, but we have big big news coming, so be warned.
And enjoy the tunes.

Growing up.

Hey Internet,
So it's a funny fact of life that eventually we will all have to grow up. Either you turn thirteen and are about to enter the threshold of puberty (which let me tell you, will not be fun.) Or you're eighteen about to make a life for yourself.
But sometimes you're a special case of someone whose coming of age came too quick. Call us early bloomers, old souls, or wise ones we know what's going on and how to deal with it. Well we know what's going on, how to deal with it is fuzzy at best.
Let me entertain your thoughts for a moment. I am sixteen going on seventeen (baby it's time too think... SOM? anyone? no... okay.) and I have been faced with the possible option of moving out on my own, finishing high school, all the while being responsible for my own living quarters. Now I'm not saying I'm not going to get any help, just that I'm going to have to be more self relent in the coming months.
To break it down in simple language, my grandfather may lose the house I am currently living in. Which isn't as bad as it sounds because gramps can support himself and his wife (Nana I think I've bitched about her before.) But he can no longer support Me, Mom, Mom's Boyfriend, Boyfriend's Kids, Baby Sister, and Himself and Nana. That's eight people by the way.
But instead of leaving me alone with my mother, grandpa has a few other plans. Now it's important to note that as of the current moment, January 28th 2014, nothing has happened yet. We are just planning for the near future and keeping events that may take place in mind. Some of these plans include getting me set up with a part time job, an apartment, and a roommate.
I'm not going to lie about being terrified. Honestly I didn't think this was ever even possible to happen. I've seen the high school coming of age movies. I live with my parents until senior year, I get the guy, and eventually graduate. This is so far from what I imagined sixteen being. And I literally have no clue how to go about this. I calculated the numbers if I were to get a part time job. I wouldn't make enough money to cover the deposit on an apartment, much less rent. And don't get me started on utilities and luxuries.
Plus my school is forty times more intense then other schools. Projects, group meetings, and being an adult with a job (or two it looks like?) As well as my damaged emotional state and pension for dramatics. Life as a sixteen year old adult doesn't look good to me.
Even after all of that mind crushing reality. The fact that I could get out of this toxic environment early is one of the best wishes I have ever had. My grandpa has done a lot for me, and he will continue to do so. But getting away from my mom and her bullshit and her boyfriends. Nothing in the world has ever seemed so worth \putting myself through hell for.
So this is what I'm leaving on. Growing up and all it's horrible charms.
Song of the day is Grow up by Paramore
As always,
Stay classy.

Nerdy Girl, Illness, and WTF School Projects?

I'm still sick, and now I'm on my period and everything sucks royally.
Well not everything, but let me outline to you my day.

• Ugh PE
• Ugh House (Learning about Ebola is literally the least pleasant thing I have had to experience today.)
• Yay drama, ugh I feel like crap. (Also huge thank you to Jenelle for being a goddess and giving me five bucks cause she's amaz-balls.)
• LUNCH
• UGH MARY SHELLEY YOUR PREFACE SUCKS BALLS.

But it does little to no good to dwell on the negative so let's go on the positive.

• I feel human today
• I got candy
• Pie for lunch
• I'm actually looking forward to school work

Speaking of drama. We are doing this really awesome play for Hogan('s? s? s'?) and although I didn't get the part I wanted, I do love the part I got. I'm playing the Nerdy Girl. And her lines are pretty rad. I feel really connected to her. I don't know, She only has like two lines I believe. But she's really cool (she also has no name so I'm going to call her Serena like Sailor Moon.)
Honestly I'm pretty good today. The work load is light but there, I got to listen to something that, although it bored me to tears, is actually pretty good once I go through and re-read it. It was just the narrators voice that was putting me to sleep.
Honestly my day has been pretty dull. And uneventful, but nice.
Song of the day Resolution by Matt Corby
As always,
Stay Classy.

Of Sickness, Non-Updates, and Everything Else.

Hello fellow Internet people. With faces. or at least some sort of feature allowing you to view the multi-worded masterpiece being crafted before your very eyes.
*cough*
Okay so I haven't updated in forever and there is no excuse. I sorta just forgot for awhile and then when I thought about updating I didn't.
I'm majorly struggling with the idea that people can (and will, and have) act nice and like they are my friend and like I'm important to them. When in reality they hate me. This is a foreign concept to me. Back in grades 1-6th I was made fun of. grades 7-8 I was thought of as this brave outspoken.... I don't know savior. Spreading the message of goodwill to all men. ( I went to a christian school. sue me.) But now I'm introduced into this world of two faced people who I can never trust. Maybe it's just my image issues, but I started questioning what drama thought about me yesterday. "What if they really hate me. They say they miss/need/like me to my face but when I turn around I'm the 'annoying blonde girl who's too loud.'"
and it sucks.
I've also started thinking in the terms that I don't fit. Not that my weight is a problem or that my size is anything, but that I don't belong anywhere. Like I have my School Friends who I eat lunch with and talk with, a couple and a fellow single person and sometimes other people. And I don't fit with them. Sometimes I just don't feel like saying anything because it's dismissed. We all do it to each other.
And I'm not punk enough to be a punk rock rebel. I haven't been in enough shows or classes to be a drama expert. I'm not the smartest or the dumbest. I don't match with my new group. I don't fit. Even in my own family, I feel uncomfortable and like I shouldn't be there.
I don't fit.
I'm also really sick right now. Coughing, aches, runny nose, fever the whole shebang. It sucks because I missed my audition today because I didn't go to school.
Oh well, that just a part of my life right now.
Never feeling completely at ease, always checking over my shoulders.
Song of the day (and quite possibly the year) Sophomore Slump or Comeback of the Year By Fall Out Boy
As always,
Stay classy.

Busy Bee Excuse.

Hello fellow Internet Procrastinators,

So I'm not going to have an excuse this time. We both know that I fucked up. Sorry.

But I can sum up the last few days in one word. Hell.

Being gone for two days has sent my grades into a tailspin and me into a frenzy. I am so busy trying to get caught up, that I completely spaced on catching you up. I feel like I need a major vacation from school, and I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving break.

But I'll be okay, I know I'm not doing so hot as a person right now. And I'm pushing people, and things I love, away. Apparently these are all symptoms of "Loose ends-itus." Okay, so we both know that's not a thing. It should be, but it's not.

School was hellish today, I'm so worried about getting perfect grades it's causing me too panic. Math is an excellent example of "What the fuck do I do here?" times. (P:s Did you know that fuck is the only infix in the English language. Pretty fanfuckingtastic, don't ya think?) I understood the things really basically but I wouldn't have been fast enough too finish it on my own, and I had too copy off a friend, after they made me prove I could do it. And I figured out a problem they didn't get.

Science is proving a challenge too.. an NC challenge but I think I can improve it..

Oh yeah, and I'm an asshole and hurt everything I hold dear, and Im thinking about just not trying to fix anything anymore.
Except school. Maybe I'll just stop having friends all together. Who knows....

I am in this melting pot of headaches and I don't know how to get out and maybe no one is reading this anymore because it's not like I'm talking important stuff anymore.
I'm cold.
Song of the day is R.I.P by 3oh!3
As always,
Stay classy.

Mercury.

Hello Internet Titian's,
So today was kinda wonderful in an odd sorta way.

I'm going to jump right in, today I was exposed to mercury.
So I know what you're thinking "Um what the fuck child are you okay?" The answer to that is yes I'm fine, and it was quite the adventure.

North house was in Shillers class, science, and we were meant to be doing a science experiment. So everyone was going up to grab their materials. Various types of things, yeast, coke, rockstar, and of course thermometers. One of the thermometers just so happened to contain mercury. My friend Smith just so happened to get a wonky one, which the top was broken off of. So the long hollow tube fell and shattered.

We didn't know it had mercury at first, so Schiller was just going to lecture us. Then Smith started pushing the broken glass with his shoe, when Schiller announced "Oh great, it has mercury in it."
The class went quite and there was mumbles of "Oh hell we're going to die." and "who did that? ohmygosh!"
Schiller herded us into the back of the class, then quickly evacuated us. We went to Van Slogs (Ewwww Spanish twice a day!) and watched some documentary on endangered species. All the while I tried comforting Smith.

Over all it was a pretty decent day. And eventful too, maybe tomorrow I'll tell you about Ipoly relationships.
Song of the day is Video Games by The Young Professionals (cover Lana Del Ray) brought to you by Vivian
As always,
Stay classy.

Blues.

Hello fellow Internet philosophers,
How are you doing today, and be honest, because I'm not doing so hot.
But all whining aside, I have stuff to fill you in on! Seriously, I haven't posted since last Thursday! That's almost a million dog years, you know. (Yay, starting today with lame ass jokes.)

Thursday went boringly enough, the only exciting part was improv auditions, which I was unable to talk about because the team didn't know if they made it or not. Good news! Jordan (a sophomore whose link I do not have) Vivian, and Brooke made the improv junior varsity team. Major excitement there.

Friday was short and stressful, as they are. Nothing really interesting happened.

Saturday is where things got interesting. As you know, sophomores at Ipoly participate in a Pseudo-Olympics, meant to enrich our minds and invigorate our bodies. In reality it stresses us the fuck out and makes us very irritable. The first component to this is the flag of whatever country you got, my country is Greece. You and your group have to make the flag.
With these perimeters my group and I decided to sew ours. We were under the impression that it would look better (It does) but that involved a seven hour group meeting. I had a lot of fun and we got a metric shit ton done, so it made up for it a bit.

Sunday I was sick as a dog. I did literally nothing but lay in bed and edit my other blog For my writing, check it out if you want. (If you do visit my other blog, then wait a minute for the nice font's too load. They look nicer then the default one's they give you.) I went to Starbucks at one point (I'd like to take a moment to say, Starbucks don't pay me. I just have an addiction to their multitude of coffees and teas.) and they knew me as soon as I walked in. A sign I frequent there all too often.

Nothing happened on Monday.

And today, well today was your normal day at Ipoly. We played bad mitten in P:E (in preparation for Olympics.) I got confused as to which class I was supposed to be in, which is completely normal. Then we went to elective and story boarded our door scenes (I wasn't paying attention, like I said, I'm pretty down so today was kinda bland for me.) Then me, Brooke, Vivian, and Kenzie went to lunch, only to be joined by Eman, Jacob, and Nathaly. (Pronounced Natalie) Then I learned how to format a paper in Hogans.

The biggest stuff that happened today, happened after school. Everyone was confused as too why I didn't audition for the big Musical. In all honesty, I don't think I can do it. I expend so much of my energy focusing on being okay, and school, and dealing with home issues, that I don't have any extra to spare. Or maybe I'm just sad, and I don't want to do it because I'd have to be happy for an extra three hours every Tuesday and Wednesday. I really don't know which it is, but I know I'm exhausted, and I can't take too much.
I'm scared of finally snapping, and eventually I'll just start falling apart...
But those thoughts are a little too heavy for the third week of school.
(Update since I first wrote this. I'm feeling a little bit better.)

The song of the day is Sweater Weather by The Neighbourhood
As always,
Stay Classy.

Savage Wars of Peace.

Hello fellow Internet floaters.

No post tonight, some really personal issues have come up. To personal for the blog even.

Maybe I'll let you know about it soon.

As always,
Stay classy.

Mashed Potato's.

Hello fellow Internet pirates!

I'm in the middle of doing history homework, way to go imperialism, and it got me thinking about life compared to the British invasion of Africa. (okay so I understand how that is a bit of a stretch, but keep this in mind you should be made of rubber by now.)

Okay so let's identify the key players in the invasion, Britain (obviously), Africa (also obvious), and pride.

Now what caused Britain to invade Africa? Pride, Necessity, and Social Darwinism (basically a really weird way of rationalizing the "I'm better then you because of these reasons" mentality, super lame.)

Now let's pull that into life. Say you're Africa, just chilling out and not doing much, eating some grub of your choice. Then all of a sudden some huge douche nozzle slaps your grub out of your hands and said "You're my slave for the rest of the year!"

That would suck majorly, now let's think about why they did it. Britain (the douche nozzle that owns you as of late.) had some sort of pride, that's how they were able to so confidently stride over and mess with you. Then they had the necessity, obviously Britain (not the actual place the person we are using in this example.) isn't that smart, or they would have realized that picking on you was a bad idea. So they need someone to do their history homework for them. (necessity!) And lastly, there's Social Darwinism. Basically, Britain is rich, like rolling in the dough could own the school if they wanted. They think they are better then you because of that.

Did you under stand that? If yes, then you understand the beginning parts of the spread of the Imperialist Empire.

And now I relate this all back to life and Ipoly. 

Sometimes life and school feel like and Imperialist empire sorta trying to screw you over, just because they think they are better, or in Ipoly's case, need you to be prepared. You just have to accept that right now, in your Pre-industry African state (I mean being a teenager btw.), you can't fight life. But one day, after life and school have gotten you down long enough you can rise up and start a revolution (Go to collage and get a job and do what you want to do.)

Okay, so that was a bit of a stretch, but it's good to give your brain some exercise.

The song of the day is Safe and Sound by Capitol Cities

Also we have a video of the day courtesy of Brooke, it's a cool little vlog explaining our friendship, check it out.

As always,

Stay classy.

Sophomore Milestones.

Hello fellow Internet Vagabonds,

Today was less bad then yesterday, but still pretty bad. But I've hit a few "Sophomore Milestones." and that sorta makes up for it. I'm still swamped with homework and various other things, but today was a filled day so it is my civic duty to inform you of all the going's on in the world of Ipoly.

Milestone number one is "The Door Scene." This is all apart of Film Creation, a mandatory elective for all sophomores. It's mandatory for a reason we'll find out second semester, apparently. It's really fun, and it helped take my mind off things. In my Film group I happened to get lucky and get Vivian! Which is overly exciting. I also got Genesis and Kinzy, whose a total sweetheart. We did the door scene with Gen as production manager, Vivian as cinematographer, and Kinzy as enthusiastic actress. It went really well, with Vivi's steady hand and well knowledge of angles it looked awesome for a first cut.

Then there was Milestone number two, I walked into an old freshmen class and harassed the teacher and begged to use the facility's of the door for our scene. Every sophomore goes through this, and I'm proud to say I survived.

I also survived my first real test of group project work, and damn are we working well with each other. I'm kinda in love with how smooth everything is running. Of course there will be rushing water under our precariously placed bridge, but we'll get through it together.

Now I'm going to gush about my house teacher, Hogan. He is one of the most amazing teachers I've ever had. I've alerted him to Mom numbering me, and he gave me this advice.
"Work hard, and you'll be okay."

That may not sound like much but it was something I needed to hear.

Today's song is Cosmic Love by Florence and the Machine

As always,
Stay classy.

Numbers.

Hello fellow Internet Searchers.

Sorry for the lateness of the post, but life got pretty hectic leading up here. But do not despair, this too shall pass.

But onto today's story.
It's short because it's late, but it's still important.

If you ever plan on becoming a parent or are a parent, don't put a number on your kid. Mom did that to me tonight. And it never feels good, but Mom added an extra bit of pain and misery by threatening one of the only things I love, Drama. It's wasn't even reasonable, she said 3.0 minimum and A's are expected.

How was I supposed to react to that?

So trust me, and I speak from experience, don't push a number onto your kid. Tell them to do their best. And if you raised them right, it will be good enough.

Song of the day is This is Gospel by Panic at the Disco!
As always,
Stay classy.

And for god's sake, don't fall into the trap of numbers. It's not worth it.

Kale.

Hello fellow Internet Vagabond,

Today was significantly less hectic then yesterday, so much so there isn't really much to talk about. The day can be broken down into three parts;

* Spanish (AKA The Eternal Hell That is Miss V's Class)
* Lunch
* Groups

And that's what today's post is going to follow, no pop ups or surprises (unless I get bored.)
Let's dive in shall we?

California state collages require you to have three years of a foreign language to get into the school. Now this could be any language, like French., but Ipoly insists on having it be Spanish. Let me preface this to say I have nothing against people who can speak Spanish, in fact I'm a little jealous, but I hate learning this type of speaking. It is literally the most dull thing I do in my day, and that's while simultaneously disliking math. I have no interest in learning Spanish, nor do I have any want to learn Spanish, so taking this class is wasting an hour and twenty six minutes of my life.

Now that being said, I could handle taking a Spanish class, IF I had a good teacher. I don't happen to have a good teacher, Miss V is the whitest person they could find to teach Spanish class. She's from northern Texas, I would understand if she was close to where they spoke the dialect but she's not! And to top it all off she teaches through song. Not like taking a song from popular media and giving us the Spanish translation, and not actual Spanish songs. They are songs for kindergartners (nursery school for all my Europeans? I just Google'ed European kindergarten so bare with me.) that are supposed to teach basic Spanish phrases and do not accomplish that. Then after we hear a rousing round of "Como te llamas?" (if someone could tell me what that means I'd be in love, thanks.) we do vocab worksheets. Not from a book, and not guided. You pick eight Spanish words you "Don't know" and write them down. I usually put the same eight words and she doesn't notice. I can handle bad subjects (Hate math, love the challenge that it gives me.) but I cannot handle bad teachers.

Lunch at Ipoly is weird. (Okay everything at Ipoly is weird but this is cool weird.) We don't have a cafeteria. And before two years ago we didn't have a building (I say we like I was in "The Portables" which I wasn't but some of my graduated senior friends were and I shadowed in them three or four times so I understand what they talked about.) But because of our lack of caf and our closeness to a collage campus, we eat like collage students. As in Subway and Starbucks, or sushi and Taco Bell. Or if you're really broke there is Vista, a tiny 7/11-esque store run by a very scary man called Bob by most of the sophomores. And I just happened to go Up for lunch today.

Quick vocabulary lesson of my own;\
*Up is where Subway, sushi (which is called Kika), and poly fresh are (poly fresh is another mini mart thing)
*Up-Up is where Panda Express, Taco Bell, Carl's Jr, and Starbucks are.
*Buffet is a buffet
there's also a Denny's on campus but we only ever go there after school or during improve/drama practice, mainly because the line is so damn long during lunch.

Brooke walked me up, she had a sack lunch but alas I did not. I was planning to just get something from Vista (Though I sent Donovan up to Carl's to see if they were open spoiler : they weren't ) but the line was flooded with new freshmen. I finally understood why we were annoying to upper clansmen. Freshmen tend to huddle and spazz out and I can't say I didn't do that because I know I did. (God there were a lot of I's there) So to Up I went with Brooke in tow.

After the walk to Up (which isn't really that long but it was hot and my ankles hurt, don't judge me.) I squirmed through freshmen and senior alike to try and sneak into line to get some food before the lunch hour was over. I gave up on Kika's line and made my way to Poly Fresh the only place that ,no matter how busy it was, never got a line. Brooke and I quickly payed for my lunch and ate peacefully, until we almost left Up late.

Last of the day was getting groups. Sophomore year is divided into two semesters, and you get one group per semester. If you have a bad group, you will have to deal with them for half the year, which some alumni once told me was not fun at all. Lucky for me, my group isn't bad. In fact I'd even say it was pretty good (but that would jinx it so I'm not saying that at all.) Our first big sophomore project is The Olympics. Each house competes with six teams of six that each represent a different country. (My group got Greece) and the first component (Little bits and pieces that make up the whole project) is The Flag. But Greece's flag is pretty easy so!

I'm really looking forward to the remainder of the year, and I hope you are too.

The song of the day is Smooth Criminal by Michel Jackson (cover by Glee) it's good I swear.

As always,
Stay classy.